Be it a date found offline or from an online dating site; first dates usually give sleepless nights and anxious days to the daters. To land a perfect first date, you need to know a few things before you start planning your date. First-date advice is different for men and women. Expectations are usually gender-specific; nonetheless, some general ground rules are common to both, which ensure the success of the date.
Read further to know the winning tips for the game of dating.
1. Stay Calm
Stressing about the first date makes it worse. Although a little bit of under-control anxiety is an essential element of the first date, it is part of the fun. But your anxiety level should be in control and should not make your date uncomfortable. The more relaxed and patient you feel, the more comfortable your partner would be around you.
Tip: Sit at the right angle to your date rather than sitting directly in front of them. This reduces the pressure of filling up each pause.
2. Meet in Person; Don’t Text
Texting more reduces the fun of meeting. You might have met online and would have done a bit of texting to know each other, but to know better and to be sure whether you both are made for each other or not, Meeting is the only solution. Wasting time on a virtual relationship will not lead to anything worthwhile.
Tip: Plan the first date in a place that is convenient to both of you location-wise and gives you an opportunity to be alone yet not being alone altogether.
3. Try Not to Overcomplicate Things
First dates usually give you a sneak peek into the likes and personalities of your partner. If you have met online and this is the first time you are going to meet in person, avoid making it too romantic. After the first date, if you figure out that this person is meant for you, you can always give a romantic touch to your dates after.
Tip: Meet at a central location for a quick coffee or snacks. The first date should be short and simple; not very short that you do not get to know the person, but not extremely long that you get tired of each other.
4. Listening Helps
Do not make the first date all about you. Chirping about your life with the intent to flaunt or to give as much information as possible to your date sets the tone off. Listen properly and keep the conversation going. Because if the other person keeps talking about themselves, that would also set the entire date apart. The cue is to know when to talk and when to listen. It’s the first date for both of you, and each one should leave knowing a fair share about the other.
Tip: Listen pro-actively and ask appropriate questions to keep the conversation going. Add your experience or story here and there when you find it gelling well with the topic of discussion.
5. Pre-plan Discussion Topics
If you have been on first dates with other people before, you already know what to talk about and which topics are off guard. And if you are new to the game, consider your first date similar to a job interview scenario. Prepare the topics well in advance so that they do not come as a shocker for you. Keep a list of discussion topics to initiate in case you both run out of topics to talk about. Obviously, the list is supposed to be in your head and not on a piece of paper. You will look ridiculous otherwise.
Tip: Keeping the excitement alive for the date, plan a few discussion topics to not let the date night end up in awkward silences where neither of you has anything to talk about.
6. Avoid Touching
You might carry the opinion that touching your date on the very first date will show that you are into them a lot. Unfortunately, relationship experts do not vouch for the same. If you are a person who touches more, you might come out as a pervert or a person who does not have knowledge about social skills. Touching is natural, and at places where it is needed, it should be done. Like handshakes, hi-fives, a parting away side hug, and so on. But do not overdo it.
Tip: Know your limits. Also, keep a check on the other person’s reactions and body language when you are engaging in any touching gesture.
7. Be presentable
Dress to impress, as it is commonly called, helps you a lot when it is your first date that is being talked about. Do not present yourself on the date as a shabby-looking person. Shower, shave, apply some light perfume, comb well and then meet your date. That’s the least you can do to show your respect and concern towards the date. It shows that you are putting in efforts into the date, and it definitely gets reciprocated.
Tip: Wear a simple yet elegant outfit and do not look like you are trying too hard to impress. Grace and elegance are the keys here.
8. Enjoy the present
Being present physically with your date but mentally drifting off to an altogether different location is not a very likable thing to do. Your calls and texts can also wait. If you are indulged too much in your cell phone, you will not be able to enjoy your date, and the other person will also get tired of talking to an unresponsive person. Be available with all your senses and enjoy the company that you have at the moment.
Tip: Keep your cell phone aside, keep your senses active and ensure to be there in the moment. Avoid talking too much about your past that it starts impacting your emotions. Drifting to your future plans also will not be a very good idea. Stay in the present.
Now that you know the tips for nailing that first date, why are you still waiting? Go for it and bring some light and energy into your love life.